Dear Sarah Palin, Please Shut Up Already

After listening to the Governor of Alaska babble on and on in announcing her resignation, one can only conclude that this is someone who doesn’t need more attention — she needs an intervention — something far, far beyond the scope of any petition or conventional political expression. It is no longer a case of lipstick on a pit bull (as she would have it), or lipstick on a pig (as others would argue), but lipstick on a hyena. Accordingly, this petition is now closed to further signatures. Perhaps a new one can be created drafting Sarah Palin for commissioner of the NBA.

To:  Governor Sarah Palin

Dear Governor Palin,

We the undersigned implore you to remain in Alaska (where your national security credentials are required to repel a Soviet invasion) and stop giving media interviews and press conferences.

Maybe you missed what was going outside your small circle of adoring fans but you and your team were soundly defeated in the 2008 election. Sensible citizens rejected your fear mongering, divisiveness, guilt by association and rambling incoherence in favor of an articulate leader whose vision has brought millions of people together from all walks of life.

Governor Palin, you had your 15 minutes of fame, and now they’re thankfully over. America has far more important things to do than listen to you right now. If, in the future, the war against terror or another political, economic, social or environmental meltdown demands the best mooseburger recipe, rest assured we will call you at 3:00 am (EST).

Until then, however, the best way to serve this nation you love so well is to just shut up. Enough already.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

The Dear Sarah Palin, Please Shut Up Already Petition to Governor Sarah Palin was created by and written by Alan Goldsmith (tripodgrants@mindspring.com).  This petition is hosted here at www.PetitionOnline.com as a public service. There is no endorsement of this petition, express or implied, by Artifice, Inc. or our sponsors. For technical support please use our simple Petition Help form.