The undersigned names are presented in an effort persuade the release of Maximus, of Team RATS scenario paintball team, to attend the 2009 Fulda Gap game scheduled for November 6,7 & 8, 2009.

Fulda Gap will represent the single largest event held in NC this year and possibly the last team event for the RATS in 2009 in NC.

Maximus's attendance is critical to the good moral, welfare and the overall success of the team. In fact, the entire balance of the game hinges on his attendance and it's quite possible that his absence cold be the sole event that could trigger the collapse of the modern civilized world on Dec. 20th, 2012. It's in the best interest of all of mankind that Maximus attend Fulda Gap 2009.

Fully recognizing that Maximus has just returned from a Double-Naught Secret Squirrel mission to the homeland of the Chi-Kongs that required his absence from home and family for a full two weeks, both he Mrs. Maximus and Mini Maximus might be reluctant to commit once again to saving the world. But we beseech all parties to consider the ramifications of Maximus not attending. The world is on the precipice of a single-payer health care system, cap-n-trade, global Jihad and a universal bad hair day. Do not let it be because Maximus missed this game!

Please...think of the children!