Boycott Kellogg's For Treatment Of Michael Phelps
-
Author:
n/a -
Send To:
Kellogg's Corporation
-
Sponsored By:
-
More Info at:
Whereas...
1) Kellogg's is a major manufacturer of cereal and junk food products including but not limited to Frosted Flakes, Pop Tarts, Cheez-Its, Froot Loops, Keebler's Cookies, Rice Krispies, Eggo Frozen Waffles, Famous Amos Cookies and many other products known to be a part of the diet of many marijuana using Americans
2) The Kellogg's has profited for decades on the food tastes of marijuana using Americans with the munchies. In fact, we believe that most people over the age of twelve would not eat Kellogg's products were they not wicked high.
3)That Kellogg's has decided to end their relationship with Olympic Swimmer Michael Phelps after pictures of him surfaced doing exactly what most Kellogg's customers do right before enjoying a bowl of Rice Krispies mixed with Keebler Cookies with an Eggo on top.
4) That this action by Kellogg's, while legal, is totally bogus.
5) That Kellogg's is a big fat hypocrite, just like our parents when they found our stash under our mattress and took it and then later they sat in the living room and listened the Dark Side Of The Moon over and over and danced and laughed and I swear we smelled something.
John Harvey.
6) That a quick Wikipedia search shows the founder of Kellogg's - john Harvey Kellogg - was a total frickin' weirdo who believe in putting children's genitals in a cage to keep them from playing with themselves and also believed in yogurt enemas.
7) That seriously, just Google John Harvey Kellogg. Dude was freaky.
8) That the thing about yogurt enemas makes us want to hurl when we look at that box of Kellogg's Yogos we have in the pantry.
9) That Michael Phelps should totally drop YOU dudes for your obsession with bran and fiber and masturbation and butts and stuff. You drop HIM? Dude won eight gold medals and probably didn't stick a single one in his butt or tie it in tourniquet around his naughty bits. Dude was just trying to relax. Seriously Kellogg's, WTF?
Given all these facts and the total disregard for your customer base and that thing with the yogurt, we the undersigned plan to BOYCOTT your products.
And we're serious.
Even though the Pop Tarts thing will be HARD.
1) Kellogg's is a major manufacturer of cereal and junk food products including but not limited to Frosted Flakes, Pop Tarts, Cheez-Its, Froot Loops, Keebler's Cookies, Rice Krispies, Eggo Frozen Waffles, Famous Amos Cookies and many other products known to be a part of the diet of many marijuana using Americans
2) The Kellogg's has profited for decades on the food tastes of marijuana using Americans with the munchies. In fact, we believe that most people over the age of twelve would not eat Kellogg's products were they not wicked high.
3)That Kellogg's has decided to end their relationship with Olympic Swimmer Michael Phelps after pictures of him surfaced doing exactly what most Kellogg's customers do right before enjoying a bowl of Rice Krispies mixed with Keebler Cookies with an Eggo on top.
4) That this action by Kellogg's, while legal, is totally bogus.
5) That Kellogg's is a big fat hypocrite, just like our parents when they found our stash under our mattress and took it and then later they sat in the living room and listened the Dark Side Of The Moon over and over and danced and laughed and I swear we smelled something.
John Harvey.
6) That a quick Wikipedia search shows the founder of Kellogg's - john Harvey Kellogg - was a total frickin' weirdo who believe in putting children's genitals in a cage to keep them from playing with themselves and also believed in yogurt enemas.
7) That seriously, just Google John Harvey Kellogg. Dude was freaky.
8) That the thing about yogurt enemas makes us want to hurl when we look at that box of Kellogg's Yogos we have in the pantry.
9) That Michael Phelps should totally drop YOU dudes for your obsession with bran and fiber and masturbation and butts and stuff. You drop HIM? Dude won eight gold medals and probably didn't stick a single one in his butt or tie it in tourniquet around his naughty bits. Dude was just trying to relax. Seriously Kellogg's, WTF?
Given all these facts and the total disregard for your customer base and that thing with the yogurt, we the undersigned plan to BOYCOTT your products.
And we're serious.
Even though the Pop Tarts thing will be HARD.
7129 Signatures
-
Mark M
-
murphy m
- Comments
- kellogs, yo're hella lame. HELLA.
-
Aaron R
- Comments
- Cheez-Its are cool, but your company is a fool.
-
Sam B
- Comments
- This is insane.
-
Avery K
-
Lisa C
-
Alexander
- Comments
- Do you know how many "famous" people have smoked weed? Pulitzer Prize winners, Nobel Prize Winners, Award Winning/Record breaking Athletes, THE LAST 3 PRESIDENTS OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA; plus, there have been 0 deaths reported as a result of smoking marijuana. Raisin Bran is the only cereal I purchase, but I guess its time to start buying plain oatmeal and spicing it up.
-
Peter C
- Comments
- Hello General Mills
-
Nancy
- Comments
- I am a 55 year old mother of 2 and I understand that sometimes people make mistakes and the douche who sold that picture for money made a big mistake. don't make it worse with your self-righteous BS.
-
Eddie S
-
Geoffrey M
- Comments
- Boooooooh!
-
D B P
-
Dawn M
- Comments
- Are you serious?
-
Margaret B
- Comments
- Oh c'mon give the kid a break, he's finally getting to sow some wild oats
-
Walker
- Comments
- I'm glad this is going on, the illusions being produced by this whole ordeal is terrible.
-
Jason P
-
Michael R
-
Leslie W
- Comments
- No more Kelloggs at our home!
-
Milissa
- Comments
- В
-
joshua elwin c
- Comments
- I do not admit or deny anything involving my naughty bits, but I am a marijuana (and thus, pop-tart) consuming champion.
-
Ann N
-
TomLiverance
- Comments
- I don't smoke weed, but support Mike's right to.
-
Slim J
- Comments
- I wish folks were like this for other more important things like toenail clipping and avoiding UT infections. Kelloggs simply proved they are not on the same path as America, so I say let em move their business to China!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
James W
- Comments
- You gave him the Wheaties contract because he won 8 gold medals, you should honour that.
-
Richard G F
-
John N
- Comments
- Kellogg's does not share my American values, I'm disgusted with them.
-
Amy P
-
Clint C
- Comments
- True PC idiocy.
-
dirk a
- Comments
- what he said
-
shawnna g
- Comments
- this is totally outragious,, he deserves a pat on the back not this. I have alot to say on this matter
-
Megan B
- Comments
- you don't want to piss off people with munchies, especially in this economy!
-
Bob F
- Comments
- Snap, Crackle, Not - Not any Kellogs in my house!
-
lary w
- Comments
- stupid move Kelloggs
-
Marilyn M
- Comments
- I refuse to buy Kellogg's products until Phelps is reinstated
-
john g
- Comments
- we the people are getting tired of this !!!!!!!!!!
-
Jeff
- Comments
- What Hypocrites!
-
David R
-
Sean S
-
Sylvia D
- Comments
- Tony the Tiger turns into a prude.
-
Diane W
- Comments
- Give the kid a break! He got caught up with instant fame. Who doesn't make mistakes?
-
Holly Elizabeth R
- Comments
- Kellogg's can suck it. I will NEVER buy another one of their products.
-
Bob M
- Comments
- C'mon... don't be such fricking hypocrites! How many of your sponsored athletes have multiple DUI convictions and are documented steroid users?
-
Chris F
- Comments
- Get over yourselves. You've killed enough people with your crap food, isn't that enough?
-
ray k
- Comments
- I refuse to buy Kellogg's products until Phelps is reinstated
-
Greg C
-
Bruce H
-
George O
- Comments
- The last two Presidents of this country, drank, smoked pot and probably sniffed blow, and yet Kellogg's worries about this from a 23 year old boy? After winning a gazillion gold medals and making America proud, I think everyone should cut this kid some slack! f*ck Kellogg's!
-
Nader B
- Comments
- What a sad world we live in that even a hero can't have a personal life.
-
Trent K
-
Darcelle C
- Comments
- I totally agree. I think Kellogg's is a huge hypocrit!
-
7129
Signatures! - View Signatures
- Sign Petition