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384 Signatures

• Jerry Falwell from beyond the grave !

  • City, Country
  • Now that I'm dead, looking up at heaven from the gates of hell, I have a bit more insight into the whole Jesus/ second coming situation. Jesus is going to come back as a Canadian ! He actually thinks the United States kinda sucks. Sorry, thats just the way it is. Have fun up there, got to go now ... time for my red-hot poker anal rape from Satan himself ! He takes a special interest in me for some reason !
• Keith M

  • City, Country
  • Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
• Why Do I Have A Puerto-Rican N

  • City, Country
  • Nazareth, Israel
• Alex H

  • City, Country
  • New Brunswick, NJ, USA
• Orion B

  • City, Country
  • Saint Louis, Missouri
• Dead Jerry F

  • City, Country
  • Sorry fukktards, they don't grant citizenship to dead folks - not even supposed "Son of God" savior dead folks.
• Stephen M

  • City, Country
  • Cape Town. RSA
• Fellatia B

  • City, Country
  • Maybe I could help Jesus attain U.S. citizenship by marrying him. I've heard he has a BIG ONE!
• Jesus (fukking) C

  • City, Country
  • If you can't grant me citizenship can I at least get an illegal alien drivers license?
• Zoltan W

  • City, Country
  • Nether realm, Dark Portal
• Rev. Mbtuu N

  • City, Country
  • Dearest One - Jesus Christ died adn was be leaving you $400m but we needing be help to getting your money
• George W. B

  • City, Country
  • The Department of Homeland security has been instructed to shoot down anyone who attempts to enter this country by dropping out of the sky. I hope this doesn't fukk with the rapture too badly.
• Ed W

  • City, Country
  • San Diego, CA http://www.PetitionOnline.com/homenow1/petition.html
• Jesъs

  • City, Country
  • Tijuana, Mexico
• mustafa

  • City, Country
  • chicago, United States
• Ned F

  • City, Country
  • Springfield, Massachusetts, USA
• Casper the Holy G

  • City, Country
  • Sam Smith, as an Aussie you may not know this, but they don't grant citizenship to dead folks in the U.S. either.
• Szkilles G

  • City, Country
  • Zagyvarйkas, Magyarorszбg
• Queen Elizabeth I

  • City, Country
  • London, UK
• Duke of Edinburgh (my wife to me to s

  • City, Country
  • London, UK
• HE Robert Mugabe, President & ruler of all A

  • City, Country
  • Harare, Zimbabwe
• Rev. Pat R

  • City, Country
  • Gozinya, KY (the jelly not the state)
• SpongeBob S

  • City, Country
  • Bikini Bottom, lagoon floor, Pacific Ocean
• Flying Spaghetti M

  • City, Country
  • Heezmaison Beaches, Deelwiddit
• Appleman

  • City, Country
  • I am 150\% for this petition! While we are at it, let's extend citizenship to Santa and the Easter Bunny as well! Hooray for fictional characters being given legal rights and citizenship!
• Big Bad l

  • City, Country
  • Darth Vader's Penthouse, Death Star
• Loki

  • City, Country
  • Because he's just an imposter and I created the Earth.
• Tranny J

  • City, Country
  • I want to go on th Jerry Springer Show and show everyone my big fake hooters.
• Christian I

  • City, Country
  • When I told the govrnment I was born of a virgin they wouldn't even give me a passport.
• God the Father & God the Son & God the Holy S

  • City, Country
  • I think Jerry Springer should do a segment about me entitled "I'm My Own Dad" or maybe "I slept with my mother before she gave birth to me" NOW, WHERE'S MY FUKIN GREEN CARD?
• Satan, Prince of D

  • City, Country
  • Get in Jesus, and when your in, send some money back. I'm not doing so well for myself at the moment... loves and kisses, your lover.
• angry liberal m

  • City, Country
  • fukarepugliklan USA
• SATAN 6

  • City, Country
  • Coming for shelley's soul USA

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