Fuck The Oven Mitt

  • Author:
    n/a
  • Send To:
    Arby's
  • Sponsored By:
    members of FTOM
  • More Info at:
We, The Undersigned, believe that the Arby's mascot, Oven Mitt is evil and all use of said mascot should cease immediately. The idea of an amorphous, living, breathing oven mitt, while at first bland and boring, becomes revealed as something so unnatural, so abhorrent that any and all traces of its existence should be wiped from this earth. Being voiced by Tom Arnold doesn't help matters any. Oven Mitt's smarmy but bumbling demeanor belies its true intentions. Having received information from reliable sources, we are certain that Oven Mitt is fostering a false sense of security among Arby's employees and patrons alike, waiting for the right time to strike fast and hard against our way of life. We must stop it now before we are ground under the weight of its malevolent rule. It plans to rule with an Iron Mitt (tm), but we will not allow its fell plan to come to fruition!!!!!
We request, nay DEMAND that Arby's remove all advertising material containing said Mitt from its stores, cups, bags, television commercials, newspaper/magazine ads/bus stop posters, etc. All images of the Mitt must be destroyed, along with any documents detailing the Mitt's very existence as a corporate mascot. Also, Oven Mitt itself must be brought out to a mutually agreed upon place where The Undersigned can witness its execution. The lengthier, the better. Only then can we rest safe, knowing that the Mitt's machinations have been usurped.

116 Signatures

  • Matt Waldron
    • Comments
    • Stop his tasty tyranny!!!!!
  • Robert Nichols
    • Comments
    • dooooo it.
  • Nikki Gorsuch
    • Comments
    • although I am not in the country at this time, I will stand by my poor fellow people who have been subjected to this oven mitt and who have suffered greatly
  • Shad Genki
    • Comments
    • The oven mitt gives me nightmares. I can't sleep anymore...mitt will eat me.
  • Max
    • Comments
    • Oven Mitt must die. Now.
  • Ryan Lawrence
  • Dan Muldoon
  • Pharrell Williams
    • Comments
    • GRIN-DINNG!
  • Daniel Rule
    • Comments
    • Do not let this evil further itself!
  • raspler
    • Comments
    • I know I shouldn't sign this, but I think Oven Mitt is so cute! With the commercial about him not having a nose, how could you NOT love this creature? Evil? Nah...however, I do agree about the voice of Tom Arnold being annoying. Tom Arnold sounds very pedophilic. Nonetheless, I just adore Oven Mitt and hope to see many Arby's commercials featuring this cute mascot! =) By the way, I'm high.
  • Ronald McDonald
  • Skipp Johnson
    • Comments
    • What the hell kinda of mascot is an oven mitt anyways!! Shouldn't it be a big hat or something?? Maybe that makes too much sense for the likes of Arby's...
  • Simmarin L. Manhas
    • Comments
    • the mitt had it coming.
  • Chuck Coryell
    • Comments
    • Death to the Oven Mitt!!!
  • Get Lives
    • Comments
    • Come on people, its a mascot..get lives,and this is not a signature by the way
  • Nasty Dog
    • Comments
    • And stop killing innocent kangaroos!
  • Erika Morton
    • Comments
    • a mockery! mock mock mock!
  • Petition Author
    • Comments
    • Don't you see?!!?!?!? You think he's cute, complaining about his lack of human features...you're playing RIGHT INTO HIS HANDS......Uhm...MITT!!!!!! I rejoice in his pain and horror as he is reminded of the freakish demon he truly is! Also, I do have a life. I have dedicated my life to the ERADICATION OF THAT EVIL, EVIL OVEN MITT!!!!! You've not heard the last from me, hell spawn!!!!!! Your day will come, mark my words. I'd set my watch and warrant on it.
  • adam rich
    • Comments
    • you all need to get a life. If you dont like oven mitt, dont watch the damn tv. dont you have anything better to do with yourselves?! How pathetic.
  • Pillsbury Dough Boy
    • Comments
    • I like it when the Oven Mitt fondles me!
  • Yeah
    • Comments
    • Some guy named muckraker told me to sign this.
  • B. David Harrison
  • Petition Author
    • Comments
    • And you have plenty of time to sign rediculous petitions like this one. If you don't like my petition, there's a big X on the upper-left that you can feel free to click on. Now, please, only serious Oven Mitt haters should sign this petition. Or people who have friends who tell them to sign this. We need all the help we can get. The Oven Mitt may no longer be using the voice of Tom Arnold, but (believe it or not) that does not make it any less evil. As a matter of fact, it is now MORE evil, if that is at all possible. It now has enough people fooled that it can drop part of it's clever facade. In other words, it's getting sloppy. Perhaps this means that he is weakening. I can only hope......and spread the word and try and get more people to believe. Thank you to those who aren't dycks.
  • Mike Winser
  • Brian
    • Comments
    • Ovan Mitt's resemblence to Michigan is pure Coincidence. We have nothing to do with that Ass-clown.
  • Toucan Sam
    • Comments
    • NO mitt pinches my ass and lives to tell. KILL THE MITT!!!
  • Duniel Son
    • Comments
    • Mista Miagi and me have solemly sweared to comb every nook and cranny until our life long duty has been completed: Successfully eliminating oven mitt! he has mind bending powers leaving viewers unable to change the channel. Watch out Arbys, mister miagi is ready to tear that ass up.
  • Jason
    • Comments
    • The oven mitt must die a horrible death, involving several moths and a flamethrower! Down with the mitt! We must fight this plauge as it infects our humble society! The oven mitt and its wretched image must be destroyed hastily!
  • Kim Staples
  • lynx
  • Emi
    • Comments
    • The oven mitt blows chunks and needs to burn.
  • ME
    • Comments
    • boycott Arby's eat at McDonalds
  • me
    • Comments
    • The Mitt is a pervert.
  • David DeSchuiteneer
  • Carcilwen
    • Comments
    • The oven mitt is the child of Satan! I can hear the crowds chanting when Mitt takes over the world..."Heil Mittler! Heil Mittler!" We must prevent this horror from rising to this height of power! WHO'S WITH ME???!!! Death to the mitt!
  • Matt Jicha
    • Comments
    • Get rid of the oven mitt. It's the most stupidest idea Arby's has for a mascot. Arby's should have no mascot.
  • Petition Author
    • Comments
    • Did I say "upper-left'?!?! DAMN that Oven Mitt!!!!! Its evil knows no bounds! It had me convinced I was running a Macintosh. But that's silly....I see that now.
  • Brian Davenport
    • Comments
    • I hate the arby's oven mitt, and the surround sound of carls jr tv ads
  • Hamburger Helper Glove
    • Comments
    • The Arby's oven mitt is taking away my limelight. Kill the anitchrist now!
  • bRiDe oF bLoOm
    • Comments
    • DIE MITT! You shall burn in the fires of hell! DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE! X_X Dead mitt
  • Cassie
    • Comments
    • YEAH! Screw the mitt!
  • Jonathan
    • Comments
    • OVEN MIT?
  • I Made This Petition
    • Comments
    • Come now, people! 42 signatures is a good start, but we need much more to make those in power take notice. Preferably before they lose that power to that cursed Oven Mitt! His abomination grows with each passing day. The propaganda paraded in prime time as "commercials" are getting worse, luring us into thinking that he's harmelss, bumbling and pitiable. "Oh, goodness!! I'm lacking facial features!!!" "Hey! Don't shake me like that. Now I'm disoriented." WHat you don't see after the cameras stop rolling is when Oven Mitt punishes that poor, unsuspecting Arby's employee for shaking him so vigorously in his attempt to greet his customers in a friendly way by biting off his invading hand. Once our agency's website becomes active, I will detail how Oven Mitt does this. Anatomically. Until then, try not to imagine it. It's too horrible.
  • Kobe
    • Comments
    • I'd like to put my hand up in that mitt. I'd tear it up.
  • Nick Greenwood
  • Corryn Siegel
    • Comments
    • I hate that F$@#ing thing
  • Tim Hoying
    • Comments
    • Lamest mascot ever
  • Phil Butcher
    • Comments
    • Seriously. No really, seriously.
  • Hulk
    • Comments
    • I HATE THAT MIT! IT MAKES ME ANGRY!!
  • MittLover
    • Comments
    • Oven Mitt is an inspirational American Icon who should be treasured by future generations! Hail Oven Mitt!!!!!