Choose to worship Yoda as your new God

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On Friday the 17th of May I witnessed an act of God. In Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones, Yoda the little green alien everyone knows and loves performed an unbelievable feat and showed off his massively 1337 lightsaber skillz on the evil Count Dooku. The way Yoda fought was far beyond anything that any mear mortal could possibly comprehend let alone perform. He was a tiny hurricane of unstoppable whirling death. It was at that moment that I realize that Yoda was more than a mortal, above a mortal, beyond a mortal.

He was a God. The God. Realizing as such he deserves to be worshipped accordingly.

Construction on the Church of the Blessed Heart of Yoda has already begun but now is the time to pledge your support... or incur his whirling wrath.

The choice is yours.

625 Signatures

  • Scorch
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • I change my mind, I BOW DOWN FOR SOLIDUS MEAT
  • zac f
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • i love yoda so much he rules over all gods!!!!!!!!
  • Jessie
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Go Yoda!
  • Jacob B
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Bella
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Go Yoda!!!
  • Gregory G L
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Matthew G
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Just like every priest, Yoda just wants to sodomize you too.
  • Lord J
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • All praise the great Yoda!
  • Alexandre
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • garde...
  • Patrick T
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yoda bless America
  • Jesse Q
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Nexus
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • All hail Yoda.
  • MOD_Goenitz
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • FEEL MY BANZORING FURY!!!
  • Cthulhu
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Hissssssssssssssssssss!
  • John-boy W
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Good night, Andrew!
  • Darth G
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • craig m. k
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Harry
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • He's Gay
  • OBI WAN K
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yoda is so sweet
  • Ed
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • As I walk through the valley of the Sith Lords, I have no fear, for I know YODA is with me.
  • Steph
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Luiz M
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • I'm gonna go on a Yoda jihad
  • CRIMSON YODA J
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Gregg, Steve you have insulted The Yoda and have turned this into a holy war. I would stay on the look out for low flying airplanes if i were you ;-) Marcus' words please The Yoda and there will be 70 virgins waiting for him in the afterlife.
  • Heywood J
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Well, would you? PLEEEASE???
  • Hell Y
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • В
  • Ugnaught
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • YODA SUCKS
  • gregg K
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yoda isn't real. He never was and never will be...if he was, i would so punt him like a football then kick him in his wee face to death.
  • Tyronne J
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • HELLZ BE NOSA
  • Steve M
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yoda is a green piece of crap. Sorry Luis but he sucks at fighting and would gotten mowed down if jar jar binks dint save his green ass
  • Jose G
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • if i plege to yoda, will i get some free food esse?.....my lawn mowing job only allows me to buy construction boots......so i need some dinero quickly
  • Marcus R
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • To Gregg...if you were to try to kick yoda like a football, he would do 50 flips in the air and cut off your legs....and i would laugh. And to anyone who didn't see Yoda in episode II....he would destroy mace windu anyday, thus being the reason why Yoda is in the other movies, and the black man is left behind =)
  • Random Fat Black P
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Ahh, yoda is that lila fella on that cracka moove, right? ima fuckin rip his wee head an limbs off an eat em!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Nathan
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • you have lost your m
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • get a life you nut!!!!!!!! you need lots of prayer may god have mercy on your soul
  • Patrick Edwin C
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yes! We must all worship Yoda NOW!
  • George l
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • I get a ten percent cut
  • obi w
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • let the force be with you
  • jesus c
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • its not fair, yoda is cuter then me
  • Liam
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • Lisa
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • In the wise words of Yoda Himself, "A can of whoop ass I will open on you!" Yoda rocks!
  • God
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • I am God, not that slimy Green bastard
  • chris
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
  • I FUCKED YODA AND A
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • FUCKED YODA AND AMIDALA...........BUT AMIDALA MORE!!!!!!!!!ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Luke S
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Who the hell is Yoda?
  • Obi W
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • dude... cool is all i can say...... LOL!!!!!! ROFLMAO!!!!
  • Bob
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • I believe that Yoda is my saviour and my God.
  • KeeganTomik
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • all hallBoda I mean Yoda GET AWAY AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!
  • Tom M
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • George Lucas, if you're reading this, ignore the continuity of the movies and have Yoda got ape on Palpatine and Dooku in the next movie. That green son of a gun is a whirling machine of kick ass.
  • web_d00d
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Oh Yoda You Are The One True God!
  • Anti-Yoda
    • Do you pledge to worship The Almighty Yoda as your new God otherwise provoking his tiny green wrath?
    • No
    • Comments
    • Yoda = Shit, plain and simple. those who worship him shall die by my fist