Petition for Murloc Inclusion in Diablo 3

To:  Blizzard Entertainment

We hereby believe that it would be for the betterment of the Diablo franchise if Murlocs were to be included within the upcoming title, Diablo 3. We hold that such an inclusion would do much for the unification of the Blizzard fan community, and would stand to inject humor into an otherwise drab and depressing mire.

What we have:
-A community ripped in twain by their own passions, nearly to the level of civil war.

What we want:
-$1,000,000.
-An infinite supply of a beverage of personal preference.
-Free Health & Dental.
-A set of Blizzard universe collectable plush toys.
-Fresh-baked pie, again of personal preference.

What we can settle with:
-Murloc inclusion in Diablo 3.
or
-The end of all this petition nonsense.

Common Arguments:
Q: But Murlocs are from the World of WarCraft. Wouldn't including them in Diablo 3 make a lot of people upset?
A: A lot of people are already upset.

Q: Gee, Brain. What are we going to do tonight?
A: The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.

Q: Is there a Secret Cow Level?
A: Moo.

If you don't believe that such a measure needs to be taken, we direct you to our fellow petition which is asking for the game to be turned into a dull, drab, grey smear. Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

The Petition for Murloc Inclusion in Diablo 3 Petition to Blizzard Entertainment was created by Concerned Fans and written by Matthew Murphy (rabidzergling@gmail.com).  This petition is hosted here at www.PetitionOnline.com as a public service. There is no endorsement of this petition, express or implied, by Artifice, Inc. or our sponsors. For technical support please use our simple Petition Help form.